(5pm) I got some work to do today. (Yeah!)

TGI Payday! (My first full paycheck.)

I got some new gloves. (The old one’s were getting pretty holy.)

(7pm) Erica stopped by to say hi. (Neat!)

Erica was asking about the Flippers hearing. (Mostly it was adjacent business owners and tenants who testified against them. (They all complained about broken bottles, vomit, parking, fires, higher crime rate, ….) (The City planners reversed their opinion about the liquor license, saying that the current status as a casino doesn't fit their plans for that neighborhood. (i.e., a yuppie showplace.))) (One of their plans is to buy up lots of downtown houses, fix them up and try to market them to yuppies.) (The question at hand was whether to take away the liquor license zoning, but the underlying theme was to make them so miserable they would move somewhere else in town.)

Erica chewed me out for not being more social at work. (First I have to meet people and get used to being around others again. (I get the shakes and I am drained by what I am doing now.) (For now, it's all I can manage.))

I suppose thinking any woman who gets to know me is making a mistake, is just an excuse for being afraid of intimacy and commitment. (Between my anxiety attacks and lack of social skills, I just can't get comfortable around women at work.) (I need this job and I can't afford to do anything to mess it up.)

I don't think I am turning people at work against me. (I seem to get along ok.) (I just reverse sexual chemistry, as always, so women aren't interested in me in that way; and I avoid situations where I would be with them in a social setting.) (Talking to women in the break room may not be much of a social life, but it's a start. (One step at a time!))

No word from Carrie. (Last summer she said her dad was taking everyone to Hawaii for Xmas so she may be out of town.)-(And, maybe she is still pissed at me.)-(I told her to redefine our relationship so I don't take too much from her. Maybe she decided she can't take any more of me. (I couldn't blame her!))

D O enjoys Erica's visits too.

Getting a cat was a good choice! (I sure get a lot of chuckles out of watching her!)

1-6-88

(5am) D O let me sleep in today.

I have noticed I don't start conversations during soak and sweat time anymore, but there is rarely anybody there in the morning. (Oh well, the older ladies at work keep me company and give me practice being around people.)

(7am) Nice workout!

(5pm) Today was busy. (Neat!)

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